November 28, 2014
Today is miserable.
I am in so much pain that the thought of having to get up to get my meds and something to drink so that I can take them makes me cringe. Moving hurts like hell. Breathing hurts like hell.
I haven’t got to take any meds today because we spent the night at my sister-in-law’s house last night & I had to drive myself & the children home. I know that it is only Tramadol and I can drive while on them if I have to. I just don’t want to unless I absolutely have to. I was hurting this morning before we left Beth’s house, but I wasn’t hurting THIS bad.
The kids and I stopped and ate at Arby’s on the way home. I ate a few bites and then the pain hit like a freight train. I had told the kids that if they were good and ate all of their food, I would take them to Walmart & we would check out the Black Friday sales. They were good. They ate well. I had to break my word. We left Arby’s and I broke the news to them that I was hurting too bad to stop at Walmart and that I was so sorry, but that I would try to make it up to them, if I could.
They were mad. I felt horrible. I tried to explain to them how much I was hurting, but they just didn’t understand. Sometimes, I can ignore the pain, if it is a level 7 or below. Level 9 pain though, I can’t ignore that. That is the pain that completely debilitates me. Hell, I was afraid that I wasn’t going to be able to drive the rest of the way home. I almost pulled over and called someone… But I made it. We made it home. Now Kesley is mad at me because I told her that she will have to wait until I feel a little better before I can get up and get her coffee (she just HAS to have coffee everyday).
Nathan (the hubz) is gone out of town with his brother for a couple of days. He went to south GA to hunt. If I had known how crappy I was going to feel today, I would’ve begged him not to leave. But I didn’t know. I had no idea.
That’s the trouble with this kind of pain. It blindsides you. It sneaks up on you. You think you’re going to make it and then all of a sudden, BAM! It knocks you on your ass.
So please keep me in your prayers. Please keep my children in your prayers. I hope that God helps them to understand why mom can’t do as much as she wishes that she could. Maybe this level 9 pain won’t last long. Maybe it will go away after a few minutes (I can only try to stay hopeful). Maybe, at least, someone will get home soon.
No comments:
Post a Comment